New Generation of Akatsuki
by akatsuki-member-kairi
Summary: Pein realizes that the Akatsuki will eventually die out. Who will continue their work while they're gone? It's adventure time! They go to America to find some babes. Hopefully, Beavis will "score"...I mean Akatsuki.
1. Chapter 1

This is my new story! In this one, the Naruto world is part of ours, but it's just an island over by japan or something, okay? Good! Enjoy it.

* * *

><p><p>

**A New Generation of Akatsuki**

Chapter 1

Lately...I feel as though someone is watching me...

~One year ago~

"Quiet!" Pein's voice boomed throughout the room. Everyone stopped talking to each other to turn to him. "I have a mission. It's for all...well, _most_ of you." he faced the Akatsuki, scanning each's expression. "Every one of you but Sasori, Hidan, Itachi, and Deidara, you are dismissed."

They nodded and did as they were told. They stood to their feet without a word, and left the room in silence. The only one's left in front of him were the four told to stay. Pein coughed to clear his throat.

"I have a secret mission for the five of us." They were taken by surprise. The leader himself was in on this. "This mission may, or may not be easy for us...and it will take quite a while."

"Well, what the fuck are we doing?" Hidan asked, already impatient. Pein shot him a look that made him sink in his chair.

"I've realized that eventually...the Akatsuki...will die out." he said slowly. Hidan sat up and opened his mouth to say something. Again, silenced by Pein's stare. "Yes, yes, Hidan. You're immortal. We know." Hidan folded his arms. "If we all die, there's no one to take our place and continue what we've started." they nodded. "So, to keep this from happening, we must create a new generation of Akatsuki!"

Deidara thought about this for a minute, then his eyes went wide. "Wait, you don't mean we have to..." Pein nodded.

"That's right, reproduce. But, you can't just knock up the first girl you see." he continued.

Hidan groaned. "Why the fuck nooot?"

"Shut up, Hidan, hmmm. This is serious." Deidara said.

"_**Because you need to make sure she falls in love with you!**_" Pein shouted over the squabble.

"What? Why?" Deidara was confused.

"Because, if she doesn't love you, she'll leave or get an abortion." Itachi said something for the first time in the meeting.

"What if she's not a kunoichi?" Sasori questioned.

Pein thought it over for a while. "Actually, I think it would be better if she wasn't." he responded. "If they aren't a ninja, they're weak, and they couldn't fight us if they tried."

Deidara was, again, confused. "Wait, what are we supposed to do, walk up to some girl and say 'Hey, you're hot, let's make babies.'?"

Pein shrugged. "How you approach them is your choice."

"Wait, what do we have to do, again? I'm confused!" Deidara asked quite stupidly. Pein facepalmed.

"_Go find yourselves a pretty girl, who's not a ninja._" He said slowly.

"**Oh**! Okay!" Deidara grinned.

Pein sighed. "We will begin phase one tomorrow."

"What the fuck _is_ phase one?" Hidan asked.

Pein tried so hard not to get mad. Instead, he simply lowered his head and massaged his temples.

"Phase one is just finding a girl, making her like you, and bringing her back here." he told them.

"Bring her back here? What if we can't get her to?" Itachi asked.

Pein thought for a while. "I see...maybe you should just wait until she asks to "go to your place'."

"But what if-" Sasori started, but was cut off by Pein.

"You know what, forget it, just find your girl and report back to me, and I'll tell you the next phase after that." Everyone nodded.

"Alright, dismissed." Pein announced. Everyone left.

* * *

><p><p>

Sorry it's short! I hope you liked the first chapter. Please review!


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

The guys walked out of the meeting room. Kisame and Kakuzu were waiting outside the door.

"So what do you have to do?" Kisame asked.

Sasori lowered his head and sighed, "I don't wanna talk about it!" he yelled, throwing his arms up dramatically, making Kisame more curious as he wandered off. Kisame turned to Deidara.

"Deidara?" he questioned.

"I'll tell ya later, yeah." he said whilst walking away.

-later that day-

it was dinnertime. Everyone took their seats at the huge dining table in the kitchen. Leader was away doing paperwork, though.

"So what's the mission you guys have to do? Why wasn't I invited?" Kisame asked Deidara for the 10th time in the past five minutes.

"Why do you wanna know, hmm?" Deidara questioned, chillin' at the table.

"Because I wanna know why I can't do it!" Kisame whined.

Deidara grinned. "Our mission is simple, all we have to do is fuck some hot girl and knock her up."

"B-but...why can't I do that?" Kisame whined again.

"Probably because you couldn't get laid if you paid for it." leader said as he walked by. Deidara and Hidan laughed. Itachi smiled a little, and Sasori chuckled.

"I'll show you! I'll show all of you!" he screamed through a face full of shark tears, then he ran out of the room.

Itachi spoke up "So where are we going, Pein?"

Pein stroked his imaginary beard. "I haven't given much thought to that."

"OH I KNOW WHERE WE SHOULD GO, UN!" Deidara screamed. "Be right back, yeah." He ran out of the room, coming back a minute later, pamphlet in hand. "We should go to this place called 'America', yeah!"

"America?" Pein questioned.

"We'd have to get on a fucking plane to go there!" Hidan complained.

"Trust me, it's worth the trip, un." Deidara smiled.

"Hmmmm..." Pein looked through the pamphlet.

"Pleeeeease, Pein! Plus, I heard the girls there are easy...if they aren't christian." Deidara said.

"I agree with the brat, if there's one place to pick up chicks, it's America." Sasori added.

"Well." Pein closed the pamphlet. "America it is, then."

"YES! Pack your bags, boys. We're going to America!" Deidara fist pumped excitedly.

"We'll all fly out to a city, then spread out from there.

"Ooooooo can we go to Miami? It's so nice there and-" Kakuzu cut Deidara off.

"NO! Flying all of us to Miami is way too much money! We're going to Cleveland!" he demanded.

"Dammit, Kakuzu! Why are you so fucking cheap? Stupid tight ass!" Hidan yelled.

"It would cost thousands of dollars, Hidan! That's way too much!"

"You know what? You can take your fucking money and shove it up your-"

"STOP!" Pein yelled. "We will go to Cleveland and spread out from there, it'll only take a day for us to run into the next state."

"I'll order us the cheapest plane tickets to Cleveland I can." Kakuzu said, whipping out his outdated 90s cell phone .

"We leave...at dawn." pein said dramatically. Everyone nodded and went to their rooms to pack.


End file.
